Fall in love with looking after number one
It can feel very difficult to prioritise and assert to those around us what we need, especially if it negatively affects people we care about.
- Maybe you need some time on your own, without anyone else’s needs but your own to attend to.
- Going away just with your partner, to rekindle the love in your relationship could be just the thing your heart is calling for.
- You might need to go away from home for an important work event to promote your career (leaving your family behind).
- It could be going to an exercise class or to the gym instead of prioritising taking your child to dance class, staying late at work or meeting up with a friend.
It can be hard to say no to others, especially if you pride yourself on always being the one that your family and friends turn to for support. But you must say ‘no’ sometimes. You have to learn to insist on getting the time and space you need to do what you need, and love, to do.
‘Sometimes you have to put everything aside and just take care of yourself’ author unknown
This can be an ongoing process, it definitely is for me. It can be a delicate balance. You may need to reassess your time management, look at your weekly timetable, carve out the time for yourself and commit to it. I know that when I have scheduled something in, even before I get round to doing it, I feel better because I know it’s coming up. Just like the feeling you probably have experienced when a holiday has been booked.
You have to prioritise yourself, within the realms of your current life circumstances. Of course, you need to be flexible and go with the flow at times too, if plans change.
Don’t allow your needs and desires to get dumped at the bottom of the list. This is a killer of your inner joy and peace, your creativity and your self-love which leads to a lack of self-care. If you keep allowing this, know that this is your resistance stopping you creating the changes you want in your life. It might also signify your lack of self-worth, or self-esteem, not believing that you are as important as those around you. This could be something important to explore and to let go of believing.
‘Put yourself at the top of your to-do list every single day, and the rest will fall into place.’ Author unknown
I can’t stress enough how important it is to look after your inner world. This will, in the long run, also be for the highest good of your loved ones. The more fulfilled you are feeling, the more authentically loving and caring you will be to those around you. Living a life you don’t love will leave you disappointed, frustrated, resentful and discontented and that is not what you came here to be and experience. You deserve to have the life you want.
‘Often people attempt to live their lives backwards: they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want so that they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then, do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.’ Margaret Young, American singer and comedian.